The Other March Madness

I wish that I could get into college basketball. I really do. Every year I'm amazed and a little envious of the fervor that sweeps the nation this time of year.

NCAA tournaments are happening and for some reason, everyone cares. Not just alumni of the schools that are in the hunt. Everyone. Catchy phrases like "March Madness," "Final Four," and "Top Two(?)" are thrown around with reckless abandon. My history teacher a few years ago got cable installed in his classroom during March so he could follow the NCAA tournaments at lunch (and occasionally during class).

I really can't watch basketball. Two things (that I can think of right now) turn me off about basketball: it's way too fast-paced for my liking and individual good plays don't usually have much of an effect on the outcome of the game. If someone makes a great play in baseball (hits a grand slam for instance) or football (throws a 70-yard TD pass), it has a discernible impact on the outcome of the game. In basketball, someone could do a triple-axel into a backflip slam dunk, and it would get their team exactly two points. Two points out of at least 60 that their team will get. Not too awe-inspiring.

But it's OK. This year I have a different March Madness to keep myself occupied. As a senior in high school, I thought that I had finished the excruciatingly painful process of college applications in February.

But it turns out the cruel and unusual punishment isn't over yet. Now I've gone more than slightly insane just waiting for my acceptance or rejection letters. They've been trickling in for lots of my friends and other people at my school who parade them around like proud parents. And as with proud parents, I wouldn't mind if a Punjabi-stick tiger pit opened up underneath their feet each time one mentions another school that accepted them. Even though none of the colleges I applied to have announced anything yet, I still can't shake the distressing feeling that I'll be sorely disappointed with the final results.

What a disgusting process. I feel physically sick when I think of everything related to college applications.

Spring fever indeed.

-Keenan